If Plan "A" fails, you have 25 more letters in the alphabet

Today, I had a pretty important interview at Asuza Pacific University for their entry-level Masters nursing program. I went in feeling pretty good, but came out feeling not-so-good. I was informed that a) I will probably not be accepted due to my low GPA unless a miracle occurs and b) if I choose to reapply or am considering applying anywhere else, I will have to retake at least 3 classes so that I can have a stronger application. The classes that I would be retaking are Introduction to Organic Chemistry, Microbiology, and Oral Communications. So...that sucks.

After excessively ruminating on the information I received today, I find myself once again not really knowing what I am going to be doing with my life and feeling like I have been wasting my time. I know that I will probably not be going to nursing school within the next 12 months as I had planned and I know that I will be doing summer school. I also know that I will be continuing with my CCE program at the hospital. I partially blame one of my recommendors for the waste-of-time feeling. She had not sent my letter of recommendation in on time and so my application had to be rolled over into the next batch of applications. Had that not been the case, I would probably be working on retaking those classes already.

I am left with the job of figuring out Plan C. Plan A was to graduate with a nursing degree and Plan B was to start an accelerated nursing program by fall of 2013 or spring of 2014. I am frustrated and I am tired of failing. In the midst of that frustration, there is a slight sense of relief. I am relieved to know the reason I shouldn't expect to be accepted anywhere and what I can do to fix it for the next time around; otherwise I would just keep applying, getting rejected, and not know why. The next time around will be at least another 6-12 months from now. Until then, I will probably have to start at the lowest nursing rung possible and get a job as a CNA so I can make some more money and strengthen my application.

Through all of this, I have to remember that all options have not been exhausted and there is no timeline that I must follow. I have 24 more letters to go. Although in my timeline, I should be a nurse by now, getting married by 30, and having my first child by 33, my life is not set in stone from the very beginning. It is also helpful to know that my best friend Christine and I are essentially on the same life paths and are both going through the same thing. Perhaps that is a topic for another post.

In other news, I am nearly done with my Telemetry rotation as a CCE. I have enjoyed this rotation much more than the last rotation. It is more fast-paced and I am constantly doing discharges. Also, the family that I nanny for has had a new addition to the family. This new baby girl is just over a week old and is an extremely easy-going baby. She is precious and I look forward to the day when I can hold this beautiful baby.